Friday, June 08, 2007

*Inappropriate insertion of Emily Big Brother-esque joke about leaving job in Soho here*

I've been commissioned to write a blog about giving up smoking. This is obviously brilliant, as I am going to be paid to rant about the pointless minutiae of my life, but terrible in that I really like smoking and don't particularly want to stop.

Also, I've never tried giving up before unless I've had a really horrible hangover or been too ill to even consider the idea of putting anything other than Vicks near my lungs, so I don't really know what to do. I've joined my quitters' group at work (dreadful: I feel like I'm signing up to Pariahs Weekly) and I expect there will be patches and motivational talks, but other than that I'm a bit stumped as to how to behave in the pub, at gigs, drinking cocktails, at parties etc.

I don't smoke during the day but have an almost magnetic fixation to cigarettes when drinking/in pub/at gig/after screening/at friends' houses etc and I'm not stopping doing any of that thank you very much.

The ban, which this blog is in aid of, will be a help, but even worse, that means missing out on the gossip and camaraderie that goes on outside. Damn.


Orchestral Blonde said...

Mate, all the cool kids will be in the pub gossiping while the smoking underclass will be outside coughing up their filthy lungs and comparing tumours. It's all about the quitting - i did it and it wasn't too bad...! And the easy way to quit is to come round to my flat, where there is no smoking anywhere in it, and no garden to have a quick fag in! And no, you cant smoke out of the window. You aren't 15 anymore!!

phaeton said...

Yes mum. But I LIKE being part of the smoking underclass. Will develop and accentuate my Twister addiction instead.

Red Carpet Rumbler said...

You will, of course, be required to take up smoking again just as soon as the cheque comes through. Also, don't expect any support at home, I fully intent to continue. I may even take to shouting "oh, sweet nicotine," at you from my room. ROOMIE!